Wednesday 25 January 2012

Tip 168: Get chased by a slavering hound.


Many things dogs like - such as rolling in decayed possum, sniffing other dogs genitals, and pooing in public with a funny little smile on their face - reveal their total absence of aesthetic sense. So when a dog determines you worthy of the chase, you are right to feel aggrieved.
This is $450 bucks worth of Rapha, I've been working on these legs, and this haircut comes from the same guy who styles Guy Sebastian. So take your furry little head and your cute wet nose and piss off, you troglodyte!

BONUS TIP: With dogs, the dullards, these argument have no traction. They'll chase you with the same savage determination they put into tearing open a rubbish bin, making everyone who sees the pursuit wonder if you wash.

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