Tuesday, 10 January 2012

Tip 156: Breathe second-hand smoke.

Melbourne is rich with temptations for the senses. See the bright lights. Hear the sounds of trams struggling through mixed traffic. Taste the famous coffee. Feel how hot the coffee is when you squeeze the takeaway cup too tight and your single estate macchiato spills on your fingers.
And the smells ... those multifarious ephemeral suggestions of exotica! Oh how they will transport you!
Of all the scents, none is more aromatic than the emissions of the cars you whiz past on your morning commute. And none of those emissions is more emotionally potent than cigarette smoke issuing from a drivers side window.
It speaks of the daredevil, the forbidden, and the gut-wrenching horror of dangerous traffic manouevres.

BONUS TIP: Gauloises suggest you are about to be mowed down by very expensive tires. Marlboros suggest you will be taken out at speed, probably by a red car. Benson & Hedges suggest that when your surviving dependants take civil action there will be few assets to liquidate.

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