Wednesday, 26 October 2011

Tip 104: Give the bird

Compared to consigning your enemies to years of sensory deprivation broken up only by CIA officers doing weird stuff to their junk, giving someone the bird seems pretty mild as far as 21st century retribution goes. 
But - when given with a full arm motion - it is almost as satisfying as denying someone's rights.

BONUS TIP: If anyone in the cycling community has a secret service with or without aircraft, owns land in which the status of law is unclear, or is open to holding dangerous motorists in morally dubious circumstances please leave contact details below and we'll see if we can hook something up.


  1. Black Jack Shellac26 October 2011 at 21:20

    I have used this approach in the past, but I find that my new approach "smile & wave" is far more effective at reducing my own level of anger, and I assume, the building rage of its target. Smile & Wave (but think finger).

  2. You can follow it up by swearing in a foreign language. Always keep them on the defensive when they go out of their way to be aggressive/stupid.

  3. YOu can also try blowing them a kiss. They will be so confused they may actually slow down!

  4. Lately, rather than deploying the bird (sounds like a dirty euphemism), I've been making a motion as if I'm throwing dice in a game of craps. It's not my fault if the recipient sees this as something significantly dirtier and more sexual. WARNING - it may lead to unwanted advances...