Wednesday, 19 October 2011

Tip 99: Regret being so cool

How does it feel to be cool? You can't sit around and talk about it.
It's not something you get asked to reflect on in interviews, like being formula one champion.  Noone asks about the gruelling training regime or whether your parents supported you all the way.
You even have to deny it.
"Fucking hipsters," you might say.
Take off your Ray Bans, run your hands through your quiff and lock eyes with your interlocutor to make a searingly honest confession: "I'm a nerd, really."

BONUS TIP: Give up trying to be cool and strike out on your own.  Sell your fixie and burn your desert boots. You could take up long-boarding, for example. I hear that's popular right now.

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