One minute you're coasting along the riverside path, thinking about last night's Chinese dinner, and the next - Quaaaark! - you're under duck attack.
Beaks are going where beaks aren't welcome and feathers are flying as you battle to avoid both squirting duck dirt and falling in the river, while a phalanx of cute little yellow ducklings look on darkly from side of path.
BONUS TIP: Shouldn't have had all those little roast duck pancakes with the cucumber and that tasty brown sauce. They know.