Wednesday 7 September 2011

Tip 63: Sweat

Park your bike and ride the lift up without changing your clothes.
You feel warm but tell yourself you are socially acceptable.  That sprint over the last two kilometres is forgotten.
Inside your climate-controlled office, you swifly turn red and sex-like.  Your shirt sticks to your spine, your face feels hot and your lips are salty.

BONUS TIP: When you go to the morning meeting, put on your jacket to hide the dramatic armpit stains from the women in marketing.  
Soon your entire body is clammy like a diptheria patient.  Before its your turn to speak, your eyebrows will fill with drips that fall on and ruin the notes for your presentation.

3 comments:

  1. Black jack shellac7 September 2011 at 23:27

    I intentionally don't change in the lift just to annoy all the a55holes who drive their SUVs to work.

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  2. I sweat my fair share (and then some), but take a few minutes to clean up in the bathroom. I use a very nice wicking undershirt + some deoderant to make myself just a bit more acceptable.

    However in the spirit of this post I do let my hair air dry, which makes for some nice cowlicks.

    And I sink-wash the undershirt every few weeks, whether it needs it or not. ^^

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  3. I often ride to work through dairy country. On a good day I get a few cowlicks too, and don't need to shower.

    ReplyDelete